1927 Neillsville, Wi High School Annaul

1927 Neillsville, WI High School Annual

FAMOUS SAYINGS BY FAMOUS PEOPLE

“John” Hemp: (To an Owen man) “Out of the way son! I can’t be bothered.”

Ray Shaw: “Pretty soon I’m gonna get mad enough to take off my helmet; then look out.”

Ken Smith: “Shootcha game a eight ball. (Say this real fast; the a is almost silent.)

Edna Gluck: “Run, Walter, run! I wonder who she means????

J. B. ’27.

- - -

It is my solemn but no less pleasant task to announce the winner of the longest name contest. (No cash prizes offered.) Let me present Capt. John Walter Bubbles Adolph Kunk Hemp.

J. B. ’27.

Geralda: “I can’t sit with two arms around me.” (Meaning the arms of the recitation seats.)

Mr. Imislund taking roll call: “Leo”

Leo: “I haven’t any.” (not having his outline complete.)

Mr. Imislund: “Open to the first page of your appendix.”

Mr. Olson returning to his recitation room: “A good time was had by all.”

Alice A.: “What is a fly wheel?”

Mr. Olson: “Frank”

Frank S.: “It is a wheel on a steam engine to swing it over dead center.:

Mr. Olson: “Can you explain it in a more feminine manner?”

Mr. Olson: “Example of first law of Newton’s laws of motion is the momentum of the class is to remain at rest.”

Glen White: What would you call a man that hide behind a women’s dress?

Everett Skroch – A magician.

Miss Shaw (In Latin III) Casper, use “apud” in a sentence.

Casper – I have a put and glove at home.

C H N – Say, what does that circle on my test paper mean?

C A I – Nothing.

“That’s a new one me”, said that monkey as he scratched a flea off his back.

Norma’s Mother – What’s the idea of bringing two boy friends with you?

Norma – Oh, I always carry a spare.

Visitor – How does the land lie out here?

Native – It ain’t the land that lies, it’s the real-estate agents.

Arndt – Did you hear about the wooden wedding?

Seif – I’ll bite.

Arndt – Two Poles were married.

Miss Shaw (In Latin III) – What’s the plural of felix?

Hale – Cats.

Edna Gluck’s favorite song:

“Tis done beneath the mistletoe. Tis done beneath the rose, but the proper place to kiss, you know is just beneath the nose.”

Miss Shaw (In English III) – Norma, read the next sentence.

Norma (Doing so) – I am not so stupid as you think.

C A I --- I will read you “The Condensation of Two Cities” – some other day.

Roslyn Warlum (Who has a poor lesson) – Eventually, why not now?

Miss Shaw – Take your book and close the door from the outside, Kenneth.

C I A – Pearl, take that home and try it on your piano.

Pearl – How can I when I can only play the Victrola?

Norma – I thought that “by” was understood.

Miss Shaw – No, You can’t understand anything in Latin.

Casper – I’ll say not.

C A I – Who was John Blaine?

Alice Hosely --- He was a son of a – watchmaker, wasn’t he?

C A I – Who is Calvin Coolidge?

Art Gress – Isn’t he the fellow that discovered the North Pole?

Miss Shaw (In Latin III) – To think of the perfect active of capture (cepi) think of K. P. – Kitchen Police.

Mr. Sharp – What is “Red Dog Flour?”

Clifford Nelson – “Isn’t it the flour that dogs are rolled in when they are made into “Hot Dogs?”

A MYSTERY

I’ve often thought it true that fate has peculiar ways, ‘cause all our famous men were born on holidays.

C. H. N. ’28

FAMILIAR REMARKS FROM TEACHERS OF N. H. S.

Mr. Imislund –

“Good, this is the smartest class that recites at this hour.”

“If the date isn’t there mark the whole thing wrong.”

“Well you don’t deserve a zero but I can’t give you any less.”

“Did you study today?”

“Don’t forget to look over your catchwords.”

“You people have the best forgetters I have ever seen.”

Mr. Olson:

“Who was that yawning?”

“If you are absent one day, outline that day’s and the next days’ assignment and bring it to class with an excuse blank.”

“When the doors are closed, all talking must be stopped.”

“Girls, some day I shall ask to see those notes, be careful.”

“Lay your books aside and write on this chapter.”

Miss Shaw:

“Yes, that’s right go on.”

“For tomorrow review the last three stories in Latin, translating them into English, review all the conjunctions, indicative and subjunctive mood, and for advance take the next stories from page 159-1965. Come to class with a perfect translations.”

“Now let’s settle down and get to work.”
“You can discuss evolution is some other class beside Latin class!”

“A test Friday.”

Miss Taborsky:

“Absolutely no whispering after you enter this door.”

“Concentrate!”

“Put some pen in your finger exercise.”

“Wilbur, sit up straight.”

“Write all accurate.”

“Positively no erasing.”

“Keep your eyes on your book and not your copies.”

E. M. B. ’27.

SLIGHTLY MIXED

A June bride asked her husband to copy the radio cooking recipe one morning. The husband did his best but unfortunately got two stations on at the same time. One was broadcasting the morning exercise and the other the recipe. This is what he got:

“Hands on hips, place one cup of flour on the shoulders, raise knees and depress toes and wash thoroughly in one-half cup of milk. In four counts raise and lower the legs and mash two hard boiled eggs in the sieve. Repeat six times. Inhale one-half teaspoon of baking powder and one cup of flour, breathe naturally and exhale and sift.

Attention. Jump to a squatting position and bend whit of eggs backward and forward over head, and in four counts make a stiff dough that will stretch at the waist. Lie flat on the floor and roll into a marble the size of a walnut. Hop to a stand still and boil in water, but do not boil to a gallop afterward. In ten minutes removed from the fire and dry with a towel. Breathe naturally and dress in warm flannels and serve with fish soup.”

WITH APOLOGIES TO MOTHER GOOSE

Ding, dong, bell,

Seniors in a well.

Who put them in?

Mr. Arthur Olson;

Who pulled them out?

The red Physics book;

What a naughty boy was that

To try and flunk the Senior class,

Who never Mr. Olson harmed

Nor by his assignments were alarmed.

Dainty, Freshmen diddy,

What can the teachers do wid-ee?

Give short lessons,

And not long sessions,

Dainty, Freshmen, diddy.

Owen boys sat on the ball;

Owen boys had a great fall;

Not all the football boys, nor all the other men,

Could pick the Owen boys up again.

If all the word were Latin books,

And all the sea was law,

And all the trees were ham and eggs

Where would we put Miss Shaw?

“Willy boy, Willy boy, where are you going?

I will go with you if I may,

I’m going to the football game, to see our boys play,

I’m going to see Neillsville win today.”

As Mr. O’Neil and Miss Phiel

Were walking out one Sunday,

Says Mr. O’Neil to Miss Phiel

Tomorrow will be Monday.”

Needles and pins, needles and pins,

When school commences, trouble begings.

Cry, Freshie, Cry,

Put your finger in your eye,

And tell your teacher it was not I.

Sonny, Sonny, the plumber’s son,

Cheated Imislund and away he run.

Mr. Hansen taught, and Sonny was sought;

And Sonny by Goose Creek was soon caught.

Little Miss Hill

Sat on a sill

Eating her pie ala mode.

Along came Mr. Platt

To have a little chat,

And found Miss Hill as cool as a toad.

He that would pass,

Must go to class;

He that hath passed,

May his books cast,

And he by an inch of his neck would pass,

Must either study or go to grass.

By E. B.

- - - - - - - -

Mr. Imislund - - “Who is Calvin Collidge?”

Clara Bartell: - - “Why, don’t you know?”

Mr. Imislund: -- “What was the chief product in the U. S. about 1853?”
Alice Braun: “They planted the negroes in the south, and consequently produced more cotton then ever before.”

Mr. Imislund: -- “What, of great importance, occurred at this time?”

Richard Hemp: - - -“The discovery of wheatfields in Wisconsin.”

Miss Taborsky: - - “What is the meaning of antennae?”

Alice Braun: - - “The cat’s whiskers>”

Mr. Imislund: -- (To Alice Alden, who was enjoying her back seat) “Alice you are working for a promotion.” (To the front seat)

Miss Shaw –“What poems of Burns do you like best?”

Bill Terman: -- “I don’t like any.”

Miss Shaw: -- “Well, I like Auld Lang Syne probably because I can appreciate it more than you can.”

Mr. Imislund: -- “What is the difference between an abstract and a concrete question?”

Fern: -- “A concrete question can be answered directly.”

Mr. Imislund: -- “Yes, for instance. Shall we bond the county for roads, is a concrete question?”

Miss Taborsky: --- “It seems quite a few of you are having a lot of trouble with fellows.” (Meaning in the practice work in shorthand)

CROSSED WIRES

“Are you there?”
“Who are you please?”

“Watt.”

“What is your name?”
“What is my name!”
“Yeh, what’s your name?”

“My name is John Watt!”

“John What?”

“Yes.”

“I’ll be around to see you this P. M.”

“All right. Are you Jones?”

“No, I’m Knott.”

“Will you tell me your name then?”
“Will Knott.”

“Why not?”

“Not what?”

Brr.* *, clank, clash * * ????.

- - - -

Ernie Begley: “May I see you tonight?”
Marie Short: - “Yes, but remember father turns out the lights at 10:30.”

Ernie: “All right, I’ll be there promptly at half-past ten.”

Scene: A butcher stand.

“Here, get a hustle on Jimmy. Break the bones in Mr. Williamson’s chops and put Mr. Smith’s ribs in a basket.

Jimmy: “All right as soon as I finish sawing off Mrs. Murphy’s leg.”

“I beg your pardon,” said the prisoner as the governor walked past his cell

Employment bureau officer: “What sort of work are looking for?”

Kenneth Keach: “Take up land.”

Officer: “How much do you expect to take up?”

Kenneth: “Not more than a shovel-full at a time.”

Mr. Olson (Starting his Physics classes in the morning) “Start at the beginning of the book and outline thoroughly, draw all the drawings and work all the problems up to as far as we’ve taken. You have 15 minutes.”

Miss Shaw: “William what was humorous in the passage from Chaucer we just read?”

Bal Terman: “I’ll bite. What was?’

Mr. Imislund: “What is our lesson for to-morrow?”

Senior: “A test.”

Mr. Imislund: “On What?”
Senior: “On History and Physics.”

Mr. Imislund: “Name the presidents in rotation, class.”

The class succeeds in doing so until the president of 1852 came up. No one knew who was elected in the year.

Mr. Imislund stated imitating the present name by taking a pin from his coat lapel and pricking his hand. (Pierce).

Esther Baird: “President Pickett.”

Fred Andersen (during discussion of trans-Atlantic telephone):

It costs $25 per minute to talk over one of those phones.

Ed. Frantz: I’ll bet two old maids would sure run up a bill if they once got on the line.

Teacher: What is meant by arbitration?

Squeek (Owen) Higgins: I’ll bite, what is it?

Teacher: Where was the Declaration of Independence, signed?

Squeek: At the bottom, I suppose.

Bandy (To Miss Piehl): Hey! Have you got one of those whirligigs? (Meaning Compasses.)

Walter had been talking with Elmer when Miss Taborsky said:

“Walter, don’t you know that it’s better to keep your mouth shut and let people think you’re right than to open it and remove all doubt?”

Miss Henry: What is a tissue?

Phillip S.: It’s like Zing-Zing; a collection of similar cells.

Miss Henry: Frank, you can stand to listen and Frank stood up.

SHOKES HAS TAY “R”

Mr. Olson: What is one thing a person can do so he will live long?

Fern West: Eat sour pickles for at least eight-seven years.

Mr. O’Neil: Gress, can you carry a tune?

Gress: Sure!

Mr. O’Neil: All right- then carry that one down to the river and dip it in!

Ken: It’s shaky business, isn’t it?

Glen: What is?

Ken: Playing dice.

Barber: Do you want a hair cut?

Keller: No, I want them all cut!

They had been sitting on the back porch for some time. At last he could stand it no longer; he must say something.

Art: I’m going to kiss you.

Silence.

Art: I’m going to Kiss You!

Silence.

Art: I’M GOING TO KISS YOU!!!!

Silence.

Art: I’M GOING TO KISS YOU!!!!

Silence.

Art: Say, ARE YOU DEAF?

Wilma: No, but you are dumb.

Agnes: We’re in a pickle.

Mary: A regular jam.

Alma: Heaven preserve us.

Emily: We’ll get canned for breaking silence in the main room, and they did—almost.

Mr. Sharp: Which is heavier, a pound of sand or a pound of clay?

Eda Krause: Why—er—the sand, of course.

Mr. Sharp: Are you sure?

Eda: No, I guess a pound of clay is heavier, isn’t it?

She still wonders why the class laughed.

Mr. Hansen (while erasing pencil marks off the globe) – well I am cleaning up the world for once.

Miss Piehl – What is a polygon?

Ruth Huckstead: That’s a death parrot.

Miss Shaw: (In Latin III) what does “Hescio” mean?

Hale: I don’t know.

Miss Shaw: Correct.

Wilbur: What would I be if I ate my father and mother?

Mr. Imislund: Why, a cannibal, of course.

Wilbur: No, I’d be a orphan.

Miss Taborsky: Why do you have as many errors as words per minute on your test?

Eleanor Kissling: I believe in creating all things equal.

Miss Henry: What is meant by presidential timbers?

Helen Braatz: Oh, it’s the lumber that the President uses to build his cabinet with, isn’t it?

If a man and his wife ate a blue jay for breakfast, what would his telephone number be.

Fred Andersen: Why, that’s easy – 281-J.

Mr. Olson (In Physics while performing a dangerous experiment): If this test fails I will be blown through the roof. Mover closer so that you can follow me.

Miss Shaw: What was the Johnson Recreation Club?

Herbert Borde: Oh, do you mean Johnson’s pool hall? Why that was - it is - oh-well, it is-

Miss Shaw: Sit down!

NOTES ON ARVORICULTURE

Nut trees are best raided on insane asylum farms.

Shoe trees that are to produce galoshes are to be crossed with rubber plants.

Weeping willows grow best in tiers.

Hat trees thrive best in-doors.

Family trees thrive best in isolated sections.